Scratching the itch

any short film tips?

Thu, 23 Apr 2009 19:43:48 GMT

hey
I would like to make a film and enter it into a competition, i have couple o ideas but dont know how to start off apart from writing the script?

just wondering if anyone had made a short film? or any type of film? if you have any advice about how to go about it or tips id love to know:P! :D
thanks

x

expressing my inner anguish

Sun, 19 Apr 2009 18:33:58 GMT

its always the same, as soon as you find happiness or have a good time doing something there is always someone or something that brings you down.
recently i have just finished performing in a play and it went fantastically well :) however now its over i am bombarded with revision i have to do and the reminder of exams edging ever closer. i know to some people they may seemnot important, but to me they are and i feel i have to do myself proud and achieve good results as i want to make something of my life.
i also feel i have to better myself and beat my cousins as they are over average students achieving A*s in everything, i want to look reasonably intelligent compared with them and not cast aside like some insignificant fool who failed school. my parents tell me this will not happen but i know inside i do not want to look unintelligent and stupid. it may seem silly to think like this but all i want is to be appreciated for who i am. maybe i cant achieve high grades but i want to try, i want to achieve the best i can.
i find the subject of school depressing whenever it is brought up in family conversation, my mum doesnt help she only adds to me looking stupid. i know i am not. or at least i like to think i am not, i just am more of a creative person. school is pointless in a way for me but at the same time useful, i like to learn the variety of subjects but find im better at being creative.
there is an immense amount of pressure when it comes to leaving school and completely all the 11 courses i am doing. i feel i am the one putting it upon myself but that is only because i want to look back and think i did the best i could and not regret it and think i could've done better.
someone said to me that these qualifications to not really matter in the long run, i replied well in that case why do we do them? they had no answer. i know in the grand sceem of life they are insignificant but i can go nowhere in life without them, therefore to succeed i need to do well.
i cant relax at the moment, i am too ambitious. but in life i only want to achieve two things, to act profesionally and have a stable career in that business and also to write profesionally and have my scripts performed or stories published.

sorry i had to get this off my chest.

Sun, 12 Apr 2009 16:33:41 GMT

Hey guys! im back :P

So i havent been on here in ages, just been really busy i guess :/

Anyways !

Quite alot has happened since my last post, i have got into the sixth form i want to go to :D i have a lovely boyfriend :D and i love with all my heart and want to spend the rest of my life with him. He is not like anyone else i have ever been with and it feels so righ!!t to be with him. :D:D!!

Its two weeks until i leave school forever pretty scary! but i cant wait :) my friends have turned against eachother but im not letting that bother me just yet, i need to concentrate on my exams!

I have written quite a few scripts XD and hope to send a few to the BBC :) to see if they will turn my words into reality and entertain the nation!
I am currently in a play as a main character :) woop! the play is Hiawatha and i play Minniehaha! She is an awesome character to play :) I'd like to thank my youth theatre leader for giving me a chance :) :D Im soo gratefull ! And performances are this week! :D

Filming for the script i wrote a couple of months ago has been delayed a couple of actors dropped out :/ so we're hoping to start filming in june :)

Okies dats all i think!

BYEE!
x

Matt Smith is the Eleventh Doctor!

Tue, 13 Jan 2009 23:17:47 GMT

Hey

This post is a bit late but anyway! Matt Smith used to go to the school my brother now goes to!!! lol Everyone in my town is talking about him being the Eleventh Doctor!!!! And i have a couple of mates that know him and have acted with him in a school play! lol It's a very strange world!!!

Anyways rant over lol
xx

Sixth Form or College?

Tue, 13 Jan 2009 23:13:03 GMT

Hi

So quite alots been happening mostly exams revision and coursework! everybody's favourite things!

I just wanted to ask a quick question, as i have an important decision coming up whether to go to sixth form and study a variety of subjects or go to college and just study one? What did you do and what would you recommend? I don't know what to do!? Help! lol

xx

Mon, 03 Nov 2008 18:49:25 GMT

Your True Love Is a Cancer

Why you'll love a Cancer:

Cancer's loyal and sincere heart makes your own sensitive heart melt.
Caring and devoted, a Cancer will take the lead in pursuing you - and not give up!

Why a Cancer will love you:

You're laid back enough to deal with Cancer's little mood swings and freak-outs.
A fellow homebody, you know how make Cancer comfortable and at home with you.

David Tennant we LOVE YOU!!!!!

Thu, 30 Oct 2008 18:14:40 GMT

Hey

So as many of you know David Tennant is quiting Doctor Who, which i am sad about but its fine as it's his decision. And if that makes him happy im happy! :D It means he gets to play new roles! And hopefully *fingers crossed* act with Billie in a sexy movie or TV series :P!!!!!!!! lol

So i just thought id post a few pics of the lovely TENTH DOCTOR in all his might and beauty!!!

All hail the one and only Tenth Doctor! He's simply the best!

Confused??? Is this normal?

Tue, 28 Oct 2008 16:50:21 GMT

Hey,

So i've been thinking about something for a while, it's really confusing me and im starting to question who i am and if i have always been like this.

Okay, I go to a youth theatre in the town i live in and have been going for over a year. Since the begining of the new term, there have been two new people that have joined. A boy called David (ironically he looks like David Tennant:P!!) lol and a girl called Gemma also ironic she looks like Billie Piper! They are both extremely pretty and i find myself drawn to them both. But i am convinced im straight, which makes it fine in me fancying David, but i also feel attracted to Gemma. She just has the most amazing smile and personnality, i don't know if id ever actually want a relationship with her, but i want to be with her as a friend. She puts a smile on my face and im afraid she knows i like her, its a different feeling from the one i get when i meet a guy i like alot. But i have to admit it is not the first time i've fallen for a girl which i never intended. I really love guys and mainly love and lust after them but sometimes i just feel drawn to girls in a way i don't want to but i just cant help it. I know this for sure that i have a crush on Billie Piper but i feel thats safe as i'll never meet her. Does this mean i am bisexual? or just bicurious? Or just a confused teen? if anyone is going through the same thing please help me, or gone through i really would appreciate your help.

Like any other girl i dream about guys alot! lol some not suitable to write about on here! :P but recently i've noticed i also have dreams about girls, its not that i fancy a girls body i dont know its just something about the ones i find myself attracted to. Is this wrong? Its so confusing being brought up in society where being attracted to the same sex is wrong. I also have no bi friends. I have quite alot of gay male friends and know of some gay women. I don't know who to talk to and don't really want to tell anyone close to me. Because i fear they would think differently of me. And im not sure if i am. But i dont really want anyone to know, not that i would be ashamed of it, it just doesnt feel like me and i dont want to be catagorised or labeled like something you buy at the supermarket.

I have also been smoking alot more, which is really bad i know. The guy that asked me to the prom has found out that i smoke and recently we've been spending alot of time after drama rehaursals smoking, we have a real good time, he is one of my close friends and likes me for who i am and i think im falling for him which is good :D as hes a good guy, well he has a bad rep but hes good to me! lol and so sweet! and he tells the best stories!!!

okay i think thats it for now :) X

I nearly died

Sat, 25 Oct 2008 13:51:37 GMT

Hi

Yesterday i was at the stables on my last day, it was 45 minutes in and we were leading the horses back in from the field. I was leading TWO horses in and at this point was in the middle, one of my male collegues told me to wait back and close the gate, so i did. As i was walking back up with the horses in my hands, there were three men standing beside the fence (gardeners). One of the horses halted and refused to move, by this point the rest of the group were further down the path, i had no one to help me. I tugged on the rope to pull the horse, it wouldn't budge.

* just a quick note these two horses were quite large and if you read any of my previous entries you would know i'm quite short.

So anyway, i waited for a bit for the horse to calm down and hoped it would move. The men were watching me and i smiled back at them, suddenly three dogs came bounding from the nextdoors garden towards me and the two horses. The horses jerking upwards, i was still holding onto them and tried to control them, but they were to big. One of them WHACKED into my shoulder, and i tripped onto the gravelled ground. They raced forward dragging me along, i slid in between their legs and they crushed and stood on mine, crying out in pain i let go, and they raced off into the distance. I hit the ground landing awkwardly and my head whacking on the ground. It became a bit of a blur, as i lay screwed up on the ground.

The guys that spooked one of the horse ran over to me, two of them staying back in shock, the other running to my side. He was an ex-nurse, ironically! But extremely luckily!! I was yelling out unable to move, my legs feeling as if a million elephants had trampled on them, it was excruiating!
The man must have shouted for help as the man that told me to close the gate and the first aider came over, i'm so glad he told me to close that gate because if he didn't i would have had alot more horses crush me as i was practically at the begining. I was so relieved afterwards it was only two and not ten who were much bigger and stronger.

I of course went to hospital and they checked me over, nothing is broken thankfully. But i have alot of damaged tissue and massive bruises aswell as three hoof imprints on my legs, and lots of big cuts.

XX

Work Experience

Thu, 23 Oct 2008 20:48:29 GMT

Hey! (to whoever reads this rant!)

So this week i have been working at the stables in my village, its been quite fun and i've learnt alot! I recommend it to anyone even if you don't particulary like horses, (like me). There have been many funny moments and i have been able to change my attitude towards horses and appreciate anyone that works with them as they are damn hard work! Totally body work out i've lost alot of weight and i didn't really need to as im already really skinny! Im nearly sixteen and still fit into age 11- 12 jeans!!!!! I have very short legs!! lol

I'm also going to miss the people i work with, we have such a good laugh and its going to be weird not seeing them again. But hey ho i get to see my mates again!! Woo!! i've missed them! And our antics! I thought i would hate working at the stables but it isn't actually that bad, some parts are obviously like clearing out their poo but apart form that! It was really funny today there was this one MASSIVE horse and they wanted me the short arse to groom it!!!! Are they crazy!!!!!!!!! So anyway i did but i couldn't reach it's back! So i was jumping up and down trying to groom it and one of the lady's comes in and says "Oh yeah forgot you were short do you want a hand?" and i was like well yeah please!!! And you know it was FREEZING COLD and WINDY they asked me if i would clean up all the hay outside and i was like yeah sure. But i underestimated the power of the wind! Hell its strong!!!! So i went out with the wheelbarrow and try to clear it all up, when i did i went to put it on the muck heaap i turned the wheelbarrow around and BAM the wind blew a gust at me the hay FLYING EVERYWHERE!!!!!!!!!! So i had to start ALL OVER AGAIN!! lol That is only a snippet of my damn funny week! lol (comment back if you really wanna hear more!)

Yesterday i went to see 'Woman in Black' it was actually really good, it started off a little slow but when it got into it it was pretty scary !!! lol My friends jumped out of their skins many times!! lol the one part which really scared me was when the woman in black appeared in a flash of light rocking on a rocking chair then disappeared! It was soooo scary!!!!!

Catch ya later !!

Sweeney Todd

Thu, 16 Oct 2008 20:52:19 GMT

Hey!

My school production is Sweeney Todd this year, (the play not the film!) and i found out on tuesday that i got a main part!!!!!!! Woohoo!! I'm playing the Foozle i have ALOT of lines!! I have to put on a northern accent!! Great fun! I actually can't wait!!!!!

Anyways bye !

Thu, 16 Oct 2008 17:58:02 GMT

What Your Soul Really Looks Like

You are quite expressive and thoughtful. You see the world in a way that others are blind to.

You are not a very grounded person. You prefer dreams to reality. For you, it's all about possibilities.

You believe that people see you as a bit small and insignificant. People pay more attention to you than you think.

Your near future is likely to be filled with great successes and accomplishments. You just need to figure out how to get there.

For you, love is all about caring and comfort. You couldn't fall in love with someone you didn't trust.

I saw him!!!

Sun, 12 Oct 2008 13:55:40 GMT

Hey!!

Love's Labour's Lost was AMAZING, words cannot describe how good all the actors were! I absolutely loved it! And seeing David Tennant perform was the best thing ever! He is an extraordinary actor! The play itself was so witty and the lines delivered perfectly! It was truly entertaining and i recommend anyone to go and see it!

I really wanted to meet David at the end and get him to sign my programme as tell him myself that i throughly enjoyed it, i was gutted when i realised he'd slipped out the back stage door as i'd been waiting in the cold at the wrong one! But i don't blame him, he'd had two performances that day and probably just wanted to go home. And he is as much entitled to that as i am. I just hope one day i'll be able to meet and praise him, even though he probably hears it all the time.

I have to pretty unlucky and lucky at the same time! Quite alot of times i have missed a chance to meet David Tennant and Billie Piper. So close but so far! lol. I missed him when i was in Cardif on holiday he was filming in Newport the next town on! I was so close to him in the theatre but went to the wrong stage door lol! Also when i was in Paris so was Billie!! Damn im unlucky! And she used to come on holiday to Poole which is where in my enfant years i grew up! Oh and when i was in London seeing a performance at the national theatre she was filming secret diary of a call girl! Im always in the same places but our paths haven't yet crossed! It's annoying some people are so lucky and always meet the people they most admire, but me i have had no such luck. Oh well guess thats life!

Enough of my fangirlness! Bye !!

Love's Labour's Lost

Wed, 08 Oct 2008 16:01:44 GMT

Hello :D

i'm going to stratford-upon-avon in three days to see David Tennant in Love's Labour's Lost i actually can not wait!! :D Its going to be so good!!! On friday im going to town with J again to look for jobs, and get tickets for a concert that night!! lol so cool. Then on the sunday im meeting a boy, G and we're going cinema and then back to his :P cant wait for that either! Hopefully i will beat my friends to the post lol and win our pact! I meet D yesterday at youth theatre OMG he is so hot and my friend said he really likes me! I hope next week when i see him again he'll make a move! Ooo i cant wait!! So everything is going quite smooth at the moment. But i know soon enough everything will go pear shaped.

Eight weeks until in sixteen! eek! Im not actually that excited lol. One of my three best mates R lent me 'Breaking Dawn' from the twilight series im looking foward to reading it! I love twilight im so excited the film is coming out soon!! woohoo! lol

So id better be going, need to read! :P Im a geek at heart! x

Anything lol

Thu, 02 Oct 2008 19:22:35 GMT

Hello it is i yet again!

So its nine days until i see David Tennant in Love's Labour's Lost i cant wait! lol then the next week i have work experience, i really don't want to do it as im working in the local stables and i don't like horses that much, but hey ho! life goes on it's work and i might as well do it, it will be good experience! lol
This weekend myself and one of my three best friends, J are going in search of jobs, lol we are literally going to go in every shop in town! lol it should be fun and a very lond day! I really need money at the moment not for my own pleasure but to help my parents out, my mum quit her job and im worried my dad may lose his as he's not very well. My mum is also looking for a job and went for an interview today, i hate seeing my parents struggling and feel i need to help out, but i want to. But i will save some of the money, i've got christmas presents to buy! lol i better start saving now! lol i may treat myself to a book or dvd.
Im looking foward to tuesday, its the day i go to my youth theatre which i have been attending for a year its so much fun, and now a really fit boy who's my age has joined! We are really good mates and im hoping he likes me back the way i like him and we can have a proper relationship. I have a feeling he likes me back and one of my friends A has noticed it too. So fingers crossed. lol
The summer just gone (if you can still call it a summer!) i met a lovely scottich boy, R and we got on famously! We txt and email each other all the time, and it was a proper holiday romance, he is a great kisser! I only wish that we live closer to each other, one day i hope we meet up again, he seems up for it and i am willing to oblidge! He has to be one of the hottest guys i've kissed, it was unbelievable that i actually pulled him!

Myself and my three best friends have made a pact, lol it may sound stupid and maybe immature but its a bit of fun! The pact is to have sex by the end of this year! lol i have got close so many times (im not a slut, they were longterm boyfriends!) but never fully done it, one time i was about to in a cinema not the most practical or sexy but it was possible the only time we had together alone. Anyway so i gave him a handjob and he fingered me, i nearly went down on him on the backseats of the cinema but the person next to us was getting suspicious! lol we couldnt keep our hands off each other, thinking back on it now, it was sad and truly young love! lol Then when the film had finished we went out into the undergroung car park. (Bad idea) And he pinned me against the wall, we kissed alot and my hands moved to his trousers as his moved to my top, undoing my bra. Then after a couple of minutes a security guard came along asking what we were doing! lol We'd positioned ourselves near the CCTV!!! Great lol! So we quickly scarped! lol Looking back on it, it seems quite funny, but at the time i was so frightened when the security guard came along, i felt like a whore at the time! It was horrible, but i don't regret it, it was fun! lol
I may sound like a slut, but im not, many girls i know have gone further than myself. At the end of the summer term, we were in music at the time and i tossed off a boy under the table, it was really risky but incredibably fun! lol then he fingered me under the table! oh good times!

Okay enough of my stories! lol

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BILLIE!!!

Mon, 22 Sep 2008 15:22:03 GMT

Hey just one little thing. :P

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BILLIE PIPER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:D

School pictures! Eeek!

Mon, 15 Sep 2008 18:05:44 GMT

Hey again!

It's my last year and that means my last ever school photo's. Eeek! It seems everyone in my year has decided what hairstyle to have or what make-up to wear but i have no idea! lol
Secret Diary of a Call Girl was awesome! This series is more of a storyline which is good!

okies thats all :D for now!

Me again.

Sat, 13 Sep 2008 21:27:07 GMT

Hey

I feel a little better today, I told my mum all my problems and she confirmed my ongoing worry that I suffer from anxiety. She's helping me, and offered to take me to the doctors and also to start doing sports to take my mind off of it. Hopefully it will help. My mum was surprisely helpful and understanding. And i even had the guts to tell her about my smoking and drinking habit, she wasn't dissappointed or angry. She just said try not to do it again. As she doesn't want me getting hooked.
I also told her about me self harming and promised to never do it again. Which i mean.

i feel as if a weight has been lifted. I don't feel 100% okay. But I know with time and my mum on my side i will be. :)

Well thats all i think.

And now on a happier note!

Thu, 11 Sep 2008 18:42:53 GMT

Secret Diary of a Call Girl starts again tonight!! I can't wait it's been ages since Billie Piper was on Television! Well since Doctor Who! lol

AND.......................

I'm seeing DAVID TENANNT in Love's Labour's Lost in ONE MONTH!!!! eeeeeee im sooooooo EXCITED!! its actually going to be AMAZING!!!!

Me again.

Thu, 11 Sep 2008 18:34:45 GMT

Now i know nobody reads this but i need to get my thoughts out. So im sorry in advance. But if there is please comment :)

Okay, where to start.

Well firstly, i have this obsession over mainly Billie Piper and occasionally David Tennant. NOT in a stalker way, i would never do that! Sometimes i connect things between myself and Billie like for instance the years we were both born in, there is 10 years difference and for some reason it is an important significance to me. Also many other things that i relate myself to her. And sometimes i feel i (okay this is going to sound weird) i am her in a way and we are connected. (it's weird i no)
(This is truly weird) Then when i am either walking in town or in a completely different country, i see Billie's or David's face in random people and i feel a sudden surge of interest like it is them. I don't act upon this, or do anything, i just shy away and look intently at their face trying to remember every detail.

But this is not the only thing i am concerned about, sometimes i predict small things that are going to happen, or what someone is about to say. And very frequently they happen. I don't know whether its just luck, but it scares me and sometimes i scare those around me by saying something like, the next song on the radio will be fall out boy. It freaks me out every time.
Also i feel like i don't fit in with other people like im an outsider. I have this weird theory in my head that i am not an ordinary person, sometimes when i walk along a street i can feel people staring at me, i try to smile at the world but sometimes i think it has a different smile and i don't quite fit in, and people know that. Sometimes i get the feeling im being followed or spied on, like theres this worldwide going on and im not involved.

I also have these intense pains in my stomach, i've been to the doctors about it, and they haven't found any medical problems. These pains mean i can't sleep at night which means i become increasingly tired. I have tried different medicines but none are helping sufficiently, sometimes one may work for a while but then my body gets to used to it and it doesn't help anymore.

I am finding it really hard to cope and want somebody to talk to, i have great friends but i don't want to burden them or worry them. My family i trust but also don't want to worry them and put unnesscary stress upon them. Is there anyone i can talk to about this? I feel trapped with my thoughts and need to get them out into the open.

I think thats all my problems.

Wed, 16 Jul 2008 18:46:26 GMT

Hello again!

This song just reminds me of how the David Tennant feels towards Billie Piper (Well in my mind anyway!!!)

Forever the sickest kids - the way she moves (lyrics)

It's getting late, your eyes are closed and mine are wide awake.
But still, I could never go on like.
just like, i'm begging just to see your eyes again.
I can never go on

Should i even care that you didn't even say anything
i tried to do my I should've given her better things
Like rings, and roses
You never do reply when i hint the message
i try to smell my best with a bottle of escents
Get to the point style and romance
I could never go on, i could never go on.

(Chorus
The way she moves, oh well i wanted her to stay awhile.
Don't go oh well
The way she moves, oh well i wanted her to stay awhile.
Don't go oh well

Huh

She's showing signs, emotion as she wipes the sleep away
i could get through this I can get through this right
you've gotta give a little, because it takes a lot to get over you
because it makes no since if your permanent if you're not feeling you right.

(Chorus)

It's a terrible thing, To know what you want.
And to know you can't have it at all.
All i wanted was to let you know how I
it's a terrible thing, it's a terrible thing.
A terrible terrible thing.

Random little Entry!

Sat, 12 Jul 2008 12:35:39 GMT

I thought i'd post an entry, I haven't posted one in a while. I've changed my layout. Now my Journal looks alot less messy!

Alot has happened this year and i actually cant believe my school year is nearly over! Theres been some really good times and some hard times but all in all i think this has to one of the craziest most fun school years even though i've been doing my GCSE's!
Well lets let the good times roll as we enter into the summer holidays!! Even though its raining and looks like its going to be a pretty crap summer!
Currently as i'm writing this i'm getting ready to go out to one of my best friends birthday parties! I wish her a happy birthday! And i cant wait for tonight!!

Now onto a different subject DOCTOR WHO!!!!! OH MY GOD !!! Saturday was excellant i was literally glued to my chair! I happy Rose is with the Doctor but sad as its not the proper Doctor! Even though he's the same! I feel so sorry for Donna :(

I think im going to suffer withdrawal symtoms of not watching it every saturday, i cant wait for the boxset to come out! I've started saving up already!!

Bye x